What is Stopping You from Attracting Clients: The Three Biggest Blocks to Your Success
If you want to know what is in your way regarding your efforts in attracting clients look at these three topics: time, money, and fear.
Your approach to time affects your success and inner peace on a daily basis, your thoughts and beliefs about money impact your financial situation every day, and fear is what keeps you from taking the actions steps that you really want to take. What if you felt like you had all of the time you want to do what you want? What if you didn’t worry about money? What if fear didn’t keep you from making the changes that you want?
Recently at one of my 2 day virtual retreats we were discussing how to relax into attracting clients with some of my business coaching clients, we tackled these big three topics on day 1. Everyone craved to get the time, money, fear thing handled. What happened? People shifted. They moved into a better feeling and being place around these topics.
Let’s look at time first. Honestly, the biggest excuse is “I don’t have enough time”. I even chuckle a little bit on the inside when I hear it, or I hear myself saying it. I used to be over-scheduled, constantly looking at my watch, and packing so much into my day that the only way to find more time was to keep shaving off my sleeping time. I was tired and burned out. I viewed time from a place of lack. I often wished for more time in a day; though secretly I knew this wouldn’t help me out because I would just add even more activity.
Then, I had a mindset shift about the concept of time several years ago. I thought what if I viewed time the same way as I was beginning to view the Universe-as abundant. What if I viewed my schedule from a place of deliberate creator or CEO of my own life, instead of feeling like a victim of my schedule? I asked myself, What if I could do the things I really wanted to be doing? I began to view time in a completely different way.
Did you know that time, as we know it, was created by man? If you doubt this, take a look at daylight savings time. A few people got together and decided- “let’s move time forward and back twice a year”. Also, who decided exactly where each time zone changes? And who decided that there were 24 hours in a day? Someone- a person- decided. Quantum physics tells us that time doesn’t exist the way we think it does. So why let it rule our lives? Instead, be a master of your life. Look at what is most important to you, and do that. For every one thing you want to add, take away 2 things (delegate or eliminate).
“Either you run the day, or the day runs you” –Jim Rohn
I like time for spontaneous creativity, so I schedule big blocks on my calendar that are empty. When I get to the empty spots, I let them be whatever I want them to be in the moment. The greatest thing that gives me peace about time is knowing that I get to make choices about what I do with it. I also find it amazing that when there is something I really want to do, I find the time for it. If you shifted your beliefs and choices about time, how would that change your day? Would you have more quality time to devote to attracting clients?
What about money? How can you handle that money struggle in your life? The answer lies in how you feel about money and how you feel about the likelihood of abundance coming your way.
The key is to shift your mindset and feelings away from “struggle”, and towards feeling better and better about your money and finances. Feeling good is a vibe that brings your goals and desires to you. But what do you when you are feeling bad? Pay attention to the feeling, notice the feeling, examine the feeling, and accept the feeling. As you accept all of your feelings, you allow yourself to process them instead of stuff them down only to have them bubble up later. As you process your feeling, you will notice the belief that is driving the feeling.
Underneath a feeling, is a core thought and belief.
When you find yourself in struggle, ask- what is the belief here? For example your belief might be, I’m not good enough or I am terrible at managing my money, etc. Once you see what the belief is, you can shift it energetically through meditation, prayer, tapping, energy healing, journaling, affirmations, etc. Decide what the replacement belief will be for you. This is important.
As you release a belief that doesn’t serve you, you want to lock in a new belief that is powerful.
A powerful new belief might be: I am a great money manager, I am great at attracting clients, I am worthy, etc. You can lock it in through writing affirmations, EFT, visualization, meditation, or prayer or other energetic exercises. This is an energetic process. It is important to truly shift the belief instead of trying to talk yourself out of a belief. In my coaching groups, we work with many techniques that create immediate shifts. Members of my tribe often experience changes in the moment. It doesn’t need to take weeks, months, or years to have profound shifts.
You don’t need to go over every detail of your past, but if something comes up, face it and process those feelings, get to the core belief, so you can shift it.
“Look for good things about where you are, and in your state of appreciation, you lift all self-imposed limitations – and all limitations are self-imposed – and you free yourself for the receiving of wonderful things.” Abraham Hicks
Money flows in when you are not thinking about having to get money. Money flows in from multiple sources, when you are truly focused on feeling good about what you are doing and living the present moment fully. If you think it has to be hard, then it is hard; if you decide it can be easy, natural, and flowing- you have opened the door. If you think attracting clients is hard, it’s going to be hard. If you create thoughts of ease and flow around attracting clients, you will be more relaxed and this is a much more appealing energy. Think about this. Do you like signing up for things when you feel like the person or company is desperate? No. But when the conversation and communication is easy and you feel the service can make a big impact for you, do you sign up? Yes. Most likely.
Finally, let’s turn our attention to fear, the last of the big three we are discussing here today. What prevents you from taking the action steps you know you want to take? Most likely, the answer is fear. You probably have many reasons (excuses) for not taking the action steps, but underneath all of those reasons are fear. You could be feeling fear of failure, fear of success, fear of rejection, fear of judgment, or fear of _______ (fill in the blank).
In order to understand how fear operates in your life, reflect back over the choices you have made.
Notice how fear impacted your choices. Did you refrain from offering your best and highest service package to your prospect? How about other areas of your life- Did you choose to apply to an easier college because you were afraid you might not get accepted? Did you take a job with less pay and less demands because you were afraid to go for what you really wanted? Did you wait to start your business, because you were afraid you might not make it in business? Did you pass up a networking opportunity because you were afraid? Did you downshift out of success, because suddenly you feared what big success might mean in your life?
What if you didn’t have any of that fear? Or when that fear came up, you just handled it?
What impact will it have on your business and your life, if you could successfully overcome any fear that operates in your life?
What is fear anyway? It doesn’t exist. It is not a thing. It is only a thought/feeling that you create in your mind. Past experiences ingrain fear sometimes. If you experienced rejection as a child (and who didn’t?), some of your fear is tied to that.
I made a decision in my own life, to face everything that made me feel uncomfortable or fearful.
I decided that I didn’t want fear driving my decisions any longer.
I also noticed that I felt fear right before a big breakthrough. This made me almost look forward to the fear experience, because I knew it meant I was doing something great. I also shifted my thoughts to seeing fear as an adventure. We feel fear when we go on a roller coaster, but it ends up being fun.
How can you process fear, when it seems paralyzing? In your present moment of fear, notice if it resembles any other fear experiences that you had in your life. Go to a prior experience, and let yourself be fully in the moment. If you were a child, and were bullied, you probably shut down and didn’t feel your feelings. As you are in the moment of your past fear, see if you can feel it in your body somewhere. We carry our repressed feelings in the body. It might be your stomach, your liver, your throat, etc. Also notice if it has a color. Take some deep breaths, and allow it to expand to as big as it wants to get. Keep deep breathing. As you focus your attention on the body, see the feeling or imagine the feeling breaking up in front of your eyes and dissolving. Practice this exercise anytime powerful fear comes up for you. Then take your action step. You’ve released fear, so you are free to move forward and do the thing you feared.
Another self-awareness tip is to be able to connect discomfort in your life or indecision to an operating fear. What is the underlying fear? Decide that you will face it. You are an adult, you are strong, and facing a fear and dissolving it- is liberating.
Another approach for dealing with fear is to make a decision to take action despite the fear. The only way to conquer a fear of riding a bike is to do it. You probably have heard the expression, feel the fear and do it anyway. Taking action builds confidence and reduces fear.
Thinking will not overcome fear but action will. ~W. Clement Stone
Effectively handling your time, money, and fear issues frees you to create your magic, to be the highest version of yourself and to become an expert at attracting clients. If you would like a free strategy session on growing your business- Check this out Take Your Biz to the Next Level Free Strategy Session
Dr. Sheri Kaye Hoff, PhD
The Inspired Action Success Coach